Using Dream

Since deciding to walk away from alcohol 104 days ago, I’ve spent hours on the internet devouring the wisdom of the sober universe.  I read posts from countless people who’d had using dreams.  My dreams were crazy, especially the first few weeks, but I’d never had a dream in which I drank.  Until last night.

Last night I dreamed we had company and I was telling another couple a true story about a time my aunt called the local Bishop’s office to get a special dispensation for her to serve steak to her guests on a Friday evening during Lent. As I was telling the story, someone had put a glass of red wine on the end table next to me.  I inadvertently drank – gulped – part of that glass of wine, thinking it was my glass of seltzer. I immediately felt warm and woozy and marble-mouthed and lost my train of thought while telling the story, unable to remember the point of the whole thing. That part of the dream was eerily realistic.  I had forgotten how awful that feeling of fuzzy-headedness was.  The best part of the dream  was feeling upset with myself and disgusted that I had consumed wine, even by accident.  I remember thinking, “Oh, shit! I have to reset my counter to day 1 again…” I was so, so unhappy, consciously pushed the glass aside and reached for the glass of flavored seltzer that I’d originally been drinking.

What’s the significance of this dream? Don’t know, really – but I’m relieved and pleased that “dream me” is on the same page as “awake me” as far as drinking is concerned.

Have any of you had these kinds of dreams?  How did they play themselves out and how did it make you feel?

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One thought on “Using Dream

  1. Drinking–even drunk–dreams are very common among people of our kind. The dreamland remorse lingers into the waking hours and further underscores the reasons why we gave up the drink in the first place. I, for one, am so grateful such episodes are no longer a part of my reality.

    Liked by 1 person

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