Eleven Months Sober

Wow.  Eleven months!  This just blows me away.

And the day kind of….. sucked ass.  We had my husband’s aunt, uncle, and cousin over for dinner. Plus our kids and grandchildren and my sister-in-law.  A total of 13 people.  Not a huge crowd, but – haven’t had a big group over since New Year’s Day.

I don’t know how or where the wheels fell off the bus – but I was on the verge of tears shortly before everyone arrived, and practically ripped my poor husband’s head off and handed it to him. I just wanted to crawl out of my skin.

I was worried that there wouldn’t be enough food (jeez you think seven pounds of chicken salad would be enough for 10 adults and three little ones???)

I was freaked out that there wouldn’t be enough places to sit in the family room.

I was super DUPER annoyed with my adult son.

I wanted to scream every time my husband got “that look” on his face when I commented on anything above.

But.  And this is a BIG but – never, at any point, did I want to drink over any of it.

And today I’ll vacuum and wash the floors and get over my bad self.  And try to figure out what exactly went wrong and how to head it off at the pass next time.

But I think it’s gonna be quite a while before I take on such a large crowd again.